Moms Have Bad Days Too

I am a stay at home mom with 4 kids ages 5 and under. As such, sometimes I have a bad day. Sometimes I pull laundry out of the basket just to discover my favorite skirt, one of the few that makes me feel pretty, has been destroyed by my son's overalls. Sometimes I don't want to get dressed because all I have are clothes that are too big or too small, and I don't want to get rid of either because I may one day get pregnant again and need the big clothes, and I hold on to the hope that one day I will loose 20 (or 30, or 40) pounds and fit in to my pre-children clothes. Sometimes I go do something I think is so great just to come home and find 3 kids needing a diaper change, dirty dishes in the sink, and who knows what else. Sometimes I just don't feel challenged; the hardest decision I have to make in a day is what to make for dinner. Sometimes I just don't like being a stay at home mom.

On those days I don't want to be told that what I'm feeling is wrong. Its not. It's not right, but its not wrong either. It just is. I can be angry. I can be sad. I can even cry if I want to. Its fine! If I talk to you on those days, I don't want you to try to change my mind. I just want to vent and know that what I am feeling is normal. I want to know that I'm not the only mom that sometimes wishes I had something more intellectually stimulating in my life than Super Why.

On those days, I find something to do. Something that will help me think through my frustrations. I usually try to talk to my husband or mom. Often I will go to another room and cry for a few minutes. Then, to really think through things, I do something physical. I run, or clean, or drive, or wash dishes (which happens to be what I did when I thought up this post), or I write about it in my journal or on my blog. Anything that is by myself and doesn't distract me.

While thinking, I realize that, yes, no one thanks me for wiping their bum once again. No one thanks me for finally taking their bottle away. No one thanks me for sweeping the floor for the third time today. No one thanks me for the monotonous things that I do day in and day out. But, that's okay. I chose this. I chose to get married. I chose to be a mom. I chose to stay home with my kids. I made the decision that I wanted to do those things day in and day out. And if I could change it would I? No way! I love my family. I realize that I'm not perfect either. My husband does a lot of thankless things too. Is he still important? Of course, and so am I.

So, I make a decision. I decide to start doing something for myself again. Just a few minutes every day. I can exercise, write, make something, read a book, etc.... Whatever it is, I do it. I challenge myself as best I can. If the kids are crying, ignore them (as long as it isn't serious, of course). Then I can keep doing those things day in and day out. All the while, I can feel thankful that I got to choose this. Not all moms get the choice. I do. I chose. And I wouldn't change it for anything.

If you are having a bad day. Have it. Cry. Be angry. Then do something. Make a resolve to change it. Then move on. That is the more important part. Let your anger or sadness happen, but don't let it take over. Make some realizations, then do better. Feel better. Be better. And keep going!