On Thursday, the weekly play group was planned for 10 am, as usual. The only thing different about this week was the birthday party I planned for Samantha. I made rainbow cupcakes and bowls of different topping to decorate them with, bought party favors for all her friends, and had beads and string so everyone could make a necklace. Cleaning the house and getting everything set up before 10 was a bit of a race against the clock.
I decided that Samantha should help out and clean the play room. She knows how to put the toys in the toy box, and it would take a little of the pressure off of me. Well, it should have taken a little pressure off of me. It didn't. I think trying to get your kids to clean is more stressful than just doing it yourself.
Now, as a parent, what do you do when your kids are not doing what they are supposed to? You threaten them. At one point I said, "Do you want to go put the toys away or sit on your bed while your friends are here?" Samantha responded, "Sit on my bed." And started up the stairs. When you threaten, kids are not supposed to be okay with it! So I came back with, "Fine, then I'm going to throw away all of the cupcakes!" "No!!!" And she rushed into the play room. Of course, she didn't stay long.
When the threats are just not working, then it might be time to reason with the child (even if they are three and have no idea what you are saying). So, I said, in a not so calm voice (probably not very effective for reasoning), "I have worked very hard and just want you to have a good birthday!!!" In stead of feeling like she should now help, she just gave me a look of confusion. It was like she was wondering if she should be offended, sad, or sorry. In the end, she decided to just stand there.
After the threats have failed and the reasoning goes over their head, its time to just get something done! I finished everything I needed to do then helped Samantha with the play room. It was as easy as that!
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